hmm..
today my feeling is so complicate..
:/
i don't know how to describe..
sigh*
maybe too much of things to think and worry..
is too many changes this year..

okay,
got a good news here..
my sister aka dong dong..
she will getting marry on this year nov29 if no mistaken
:)
actually should be a happy and sweet things..
but..
marry..
seriously is not just for a couple..
there are still got a lot of matter, peoples let them to think..
sometime also because of that..
will make a couple have some argument, quarrel..
a lots a lots..
no matter how,
seriously i wish them can stay sweet forever and ever..
and wish her boyfriend will be treat her very very good and make her happy always..
besides,
most important is when she go there will has a great and happy new life there..
although now already start have some argument..
have some unhappy matter appear..
hope everything will be fine soon ..
:)
dajie..
你一定要幸福..
真的..
一定要..
hope what we are worries about will not happen lar..
:)

Next,
my mom..
suddenly i got a feeling..
my parents they are seriously getting older and older already..
their healthy also seem like not strong as before..
sigh*
again..
complicate feelings
a lots..
i really don't know how to express it all..
especially my mom..
recently i really start feel worry about her..
i don't know what happen to her..
she likes got many things worry like that..
day day look so upset,nervous,bewildered..
and her health..
last night she told me her hands will 麻痹 at night..
and elbow also pain too..
elbow pain might be she get hurt when she was young..
i most worry is about she said hands will 麻痹..
i last night help her do massage..
then i go online do some research.
mostly answer is either heart disease cause or the neck,backbone problem cause it..
besides, i still got heart dajie said before..
she said she felt mom recently like will easily 喘..
i really worry ..
most worry is will get stroke or what..
please..
don't okay..
i still got a lot things haven't do..
i haven't graduate my degree..
i haven't can come out earn money and treat her eat many nice and delicious food..
i haven't let her go travel and enjoy, relax..
still a lots..
we call her go body check ..
she is really kind of stubborn..
don't want go for body check..
sigh*
maybe like dajie said..
we shouldn't think so much..
maybe is high cholesterol cause it..
find a day bring her go check..
if is high cholesterol then will be better..
eat medicine should be okay..

okay okay..
goh chin pheng..
be positive okay??
ush!

In the other hand..
my further studies..
sigh*
maybe i am having too much of holidays..
so i keep think too much bah..
really ..
i feel stress..
every time when i think of it..
i will think till insomnia..
:/
i will think..
can i pass all of it?
can i graduate my degree successfully?
can i cope all the problems, likes the environment,people,assignment?
how about my future work?
i find what job do?
if one day ..
got a hotel offer me a manager job..
seriously,
can i handle?
until now,
i really don't know how to handle, manage a department..
suddenly think till that..
i feel everything is so horrible..
i am afraid..
:(
i know i am think till too over..
but seriously all this we should start think already what?
not?
sigh*
i really gonna crazy..
zzz
-,-

COMPLICATED FEELINGS!

These year,
2012..
really will have many changes for all of us..
for papa mama, dajie, erjie, and me..
for papa mama..
we all will leave already..
like dajie will marry already..
erjie after that graduate will go kl for event planner short course..
and i will go Taylor's study already, for 2 years..
so this year..
will just left papa mama and baby ashley in the house only..
don't know what my mom will feel leh?
should be feel very weird and lonely i think..

for dajie..
just now say already..
marry mar..
after that got many things face..

for erjie..
after graduate..
she really start her journey..
try to reach her goals..
be a professional event planner..

for me..
a brand new life..
really very new and strange life for me..
kl life..
uni life..
haih..
a lot i need to think..
a lot i need to learn..
so i think..
after finish study at there..
i think i will be change bah..
hope can me change more mature,independent and self confident
:)

Garyao bah!
i should not be so emo anymore!
garyao goh chin pheng!
u can do it!
ush!
;)